I’m slightly nervous as Sula comes closer. I
haven’t seen her in a while so I’m thrilled. We agreed to meet in a clearing in
the woods near her house, just outside of Rosinhill. It is a sunny afternoon
and the low rays shine through the spruce and pine trees down onto Sula’s face.
Her dark long hair shines and appears more honey coloured brown at one side and
black on the other. Her cheekbones are high and feminine, her skin is bronze
and flawless as ever, but her almond shaped eyes are the most intriguing thing about
her; they are a vivid green, like that of new leaves, but when I look again
they are darker; jade. Is she reading
me?
We greet and sit down on a fallen tree. She
appears strong and charismatic and I understand why both Felix and Feline fell
for her.
After the initial stage of awkwardness we begin to
feel more comfortable and I ask her if she is ready for my questions. She
smiles lightly and nods.
How do you feel about
your mother, now that you’re an adult?
My mother, rest her soul, I still miss her dearly.
She did what she had to do for the continuance of our species and later she had
my best interest at heart, I know that, but at the same time it hasn’t been
easy to accept that I had to do the same thing; especially when I thought time
was running out. Had I known, I perhaps would have waited. She knew so little
about our kind, our physics; only from what she was taught as a child before
the killings.
So you’re saying you
regret meeting Felix and having Fay?
No, not at all. I regret acting so soon whilst, in
hindsight, I could have waited. I didn’t think straight when I met Felix, all I
could think of, after saving his village, was him and how special he was. He
wasn’t like any human I’d ever met. The promise I had made to my mother came to
my mind and a decision was easily made. Felix knew of course, I had no secrets,
but he didn’t object. In fact I believe he even suggested it, not with so many
words but still.
What would have happened do
you think if you hadn’t met Felix?
If I hadn’t crashed into him that day you mean, ha
ha? No seriously, I would have done the same thing with someone else. That was
the promise I was nearly forty after all. I might not have stayed though. Now I
know of course that comyenti women are fertile until they are seventy, so yes I
think I would have rather waited. But then again it’s no use speculating.
What’s done is done and I’m happy with how things have turned out.
But do you have any other
regrets? Do you regret staying with him?
Yes and no, sometimes.
That’s too vague. Can you
explain?
I’m a half-breed and I still don’t really know
much about my species. What I’m sometimes feeling; that need for freedom and
solitude: is it me or is it the comyenti in me? Feline understood, but Felix is
not ready to find out about her and my feelings for her. I will tell him one
day, but not now.
Alright. How do you feel
about Shazar? He could have told you more since he is a full comyenti?
Don’t get me started on him. He has his own hidden
agenda. I’m sure he is a nice person underneath, but he lets his personal
feelings and his task of ‘saving our species’ cloud his judgements. Even though
I can read his mind, literally, I still don’t trust him completely. He is definitely
blocking things from me, but it’s not comyenti things as he told me everything
I needed to know. I’m not entirely sure what it is he’s hiding, but I will find
out somehow.
What is your greatest
fear?
That something will happen to my children. Especially
since we suffered those attacks from the mysterious shapeshifting ypaka I don’t
know if we’re safe here. All we can do is prepare our children to be more
powerful and train them.
What do you want from
life?
What everyone else wants; a peaceful simple life
whereby we can all live in harmony and safety. Perpetual happiness.
What, in yourself, is
preventing you from getting it?
Like I mentioned before; I very much need my
freedom and solitude, and sometimes I struggle with the right balance between
being happy by myself and being there for everyone else and at the same time keeping
them safe.
What, in the outside
world, is preventing you from getting it?
I can’t wait for my children to grow up and leave
the house, ha ha! No, I love them dearly and we are very close, but sometimes
it gets too much and I need space. They accept the way I am and that is the
best thing I could ask from them. I try to give them all the tools they need
for life but somehow I fear it might not be enough. The ypaka and even Shazar
might prevent our happiness, our safety.
How do you fall in love?
At first sight? Over a long period?
Oh, another personal question. Ahem, well, I think
with Felix I was quite taken from the moment I saw that single strand of blonde
hair of his underneath his dark hood fluttering in the wind. It was quite a
poetic moment. And when I met his eyes…and when he started talking… Er, so yes
I suppose it was love at first sight, although I tried to deny it of course at
first and was a bit harsh on him.
And with Feline?
That was different because I was already with
Felix, so she was out of the question. I’m faithful when I’m with someone, but
I’ve always felt an amazing attraction towards her and we soon became best
friends. At first I thought it was because she was his twin sister and because
I had a Heartmerge with her brother that it, somehow, stretched out to her. Now
I know that it was more than just that and if it weren’t for Felix-
How do you decide whether
you can trust someone? Is it from experience? Can you tell from first
impressions? Is it more intuition? Do you test the person somehow? Or are you
just generally disposed to trust or not to trust?
Before I met Felix, who is human of course, I
generally distrusted every human. I had every right to as they almost exterminated
my entire species. But it was an instilled distrust. Whether it was in my genes
or if my mother is to blame I don’t know, but over time I learned to see not
all people have bad intentions. That mistrust has kept me safe for years. My
intuition is quite spot on, but if I’m not sure about someone, I will read
their minds, not always literally their thoughts,
as that’s beyond my limits with humans I haven’t merged with, but their
intentions. They are easy to read for me. Body language is very important but
also the images they send out, like any other animal does.
Is one sense more highly
developed than another?
When I’m in a Mindmode it depends on what animal
skills I have borrowed. If it’s just me; half-comyenti, half-human, I would say
my sixth sense takes over. My vision and hearing are superb, but looking is not
the same thing as seeing and listening is not the same thing as hearing.
What do you consider are
your strengths?
I don’t give up easily. I try to get to the bottom
of things to find out the truth, and try to set things right if I can.
What do you consider are
your weaknesses?
I feel too much. All those triggers sometimes
cause an overload on my senses and the world around me starts to spin. I am
powerless in situations like that. It is the curse of the comyenti and we still
haven’t found a way to beat it.
What’s the worst thing
you’ve ever done? And why?
I lied to Felix. It is not in my nature and it
feels really wrong.
If you could change into
any animal, which would it be?
Why would I with my abilities? However, if I could
literally change shape I would like to know what if feels like to have wings,
so perhaps an albatross or goose.
(Graphics provided by author)
When we say our goodbyes I can’t help but feel
sorry for her somehow. I don’t know why. She is such a strong woman, but also
vulnerable and sensitive. Only I know what will happen next, but I can’t tell
her that. She knows it and doesn’t ask. I’m more than an observer of course. I
can influence everything, for I’m the
author after all; the author of her
story; of both her and her family and of her kind. I am their judge and
executioner. But even I don’t know the details yet. I first have to sit down
and open my mind to it.
But I save that for another time.
Book 3 in the series, ‘Controller of The Senses’
is expected later in 2015, so stay tuned.
The e-book of ‘Call
Off The Search’ (book 1) is currently free until the 20th of February. Keep
reading in Book 2, ‘Children Of The Sun’,
or get ‘The Comyenti Book Bundle Volume
1&2’ for an easy reading experience.
Thank you, Louise. I hope you enjoy the series (:
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